By Elliott Topkins, Esquire
6/9/11
I spend a lot of time thinking about the vagaries of negotiating. Negotiating is far from an exact science, and success in negotiating often hinges on developing a sound strategy and then staying consistent after the proper strategy has been settled upon. In the past, I have stressed how important it is for people to “walk,” or threaten to walk, at some point in negotiations, either before the property was placed under agreement or at the closing table.

The consistent approach I use when negotiating is to work hard in the beginning of the engagement to develop, and buy into, a set of realistic expectations from my client, and then try as hard as I can to keep that “wish list,” if you will, in front of the client, at all stages, with the objective that the client would not change course and start to ask for new concessions, normally late in the game.

This approach appears commendable. Almost everything in our business improves with preparation and diligence. I would suggest another important element when I speak with my client early in the game. I tell my client that emotions should be “left at home” while they are negotiating for their home.

As much as they want the home, or want to sell the home, they need to maintain a “poker face” throughout the process.

In my experience, any significant show of emotion by buyer or seller opens up the doors to the other side. A client needs to be comfortable with his or her goals for the transaction. They may change somewhat after the home inspection. Perhaps, they need even to be put down in writing. But, I have found that we do our best for our clients if we remind them, gently but firmly, that they should not lose sight of what their goals were in the transaction when the transaction began, including what they really expected when buying or selling. The object of my early contacts with my client is to arrive at attainable objectives and then committing not to deviate significantly after the home inspection or review of the proposed purchase-and-sale agreement.

Sometimes the best way to remove emotion is to remove the client. I urge my seller clients not to attend the closing. Nothing is added by the seller’s presence, and the chance for an emotional flare-up is increased by the seller’s presence. The parties do not need to like the people on the other side; they just need to accomplish what they originally set out to do, purchase, or sell, the property, on terms which they have assessed as fair. If I can keep them focused on that course, I am doing my job. I can tell you in 43 years of serving as a residential real estate attorney in Massachusetts; it has not always been easy.

(Mr. Topkins is an attorney with Topkins & Bevans, Braintree Executive Park, 150 Grossman Dr., Braintree, MA 02184. His blog can be found at http://realtorsresourceblog.com. His e-mail address is etopkins@topbev.com.)